During my mom's many months of living at the rehabilitation hospital, I spent a lot of time with her at her different therapy appointments: physical, occupational and speech. This meant I could extend and bridge her therapy practices with the rest of her life. I knew what to practice later and how to refer to things to reinforce her therapies. I think for her to be able to hear the strange new words and exercises in a familiar voice was helpful in taking it all in. For me, it was invaluable for my confidence and direction, both in learning the professional goals and exercises and in designing and adjusting my own seat-of-the-pants daily game plan. 

Her therapists were appreciative of the extra reinforcement she got since they would have loved to have had more time with each of their patients. They let me know that my help enabled their work to go further.

Remember, in the early days she was relearning how to speak, walk, sit down, get up, recognize printed imaged, answer questions by pointing, feed her self, brush her teeth. The sooner she mastered one thing, the sooner she was ready to move on. Her skills grew steadily, her awareness returned slowly and she progressed beyond what was expected. It was often exhilarating for me.

There were times when it was clear it would be best if my mother went to her appointments alone. It was something like sending your child off to school for the first time, for those of you who have done that. You know it is time for them to see how they are in the world without your influence and immediate support. It was kind of like that... except with a stroke victim every day is a new day and you never really know for sure if it is a day you should walk them to the room, or into the room, or stay and participate. It is not quite such a linear path developmentally as with a child. But as I write this, I realize that for the children it probably wasn’t all that linear either. I am sure there were days when going alone was just what they needed, but other days a loving hand was more appropriate for security, belongingness and the felt sense of safety needed to learn and express well that day.

There are also the relationships of the patient with their particular therapists to consider. I don’t know if we were just lucky, but all of the therapists were really wonderful. My mother had a delightful relationship with each one, although a little intervention was required on my part with speech early on. More on that later.

The therapists were welcoming, effective and seemed to really enjoy working with my mother. They were helpful to me and encouraged my participation in their therapies. They welcomed hearing the reports of my mother’s daily progress with me. They could then incorporate that progress into their next steps with her.