The Apple and the Orange
In the Intensive Care Unit (ICU) at the emergency hospital after the first days and week of her stroke, they would bring food trays to my mother and she wouldn't eat anything. One day the tray had a bright perfectly round orange on it. It was the brightest thing in the room. I knew she wouldn't eat it but when they took the tray, I kept the orange. I didn't want to eat it either. I wanted it for play therapy.
I put the orange on her lap on top of her blankets. I just set it there. I don't even think I said anything right away. I made sure she saw it though because she was really just glancing around and trying to see what the nurses were doing in her observation window. She did not like the nighttime nurses because she had sundowners and they tied her wrists to the bed sides, so she wouldn't rip her IV out. It was an awful awful battle that I found out after observing soft ties tied around her wrists and asked what they were.
Then I started moving the orange. I touched her body with it. I turned her hand over and placed it in her hand and I also said some words with it like “That is a very beautiful orange” and “It is so round and it has a bumpy texture”. She didn't really respond, but she saw it. I knew she saw it. It also had a strong odor which she couldn't smell, I would find out much later.
The next day they brought the tray, she again didn't eat anything, but on the tray was a bright red apple. You know the kind: they're not exactly straight off an organic tree or one in your backyard. They seem to be far beyond perfect and probably tasteless but I kept it. Now I had an apple and an orange. I put them both on her lap. The contrast was lovely. The similarities were also quite obvious so I talked about it. They're both fruit, one red and one orange. The apple is not as round as the orange. Just a bunch of stuff like that. Simple. One or two words. Eventually, I put the apple in one of her hands and the orange in her other hand. She held them. Her hands were just resting on the blanket. She’d look back-and-forth, get distracted by the nurses in the viewing window, and then look at the fruit again.
Every day I brought things for her to see and every day I had to take them home because the nurses told me things get stolen. But the apple and the orange did not get stolen so we used them a lot. Every day I did a Brain Gym exercise called Naval Radiation where you roll a ball in a systematic way on someone's body starting in the center of the body and rolling out to each limb. I had been doing this with a ball I would bring but at this time I used the orange.
I got a lot of mileage out of those fruits.
Summary: Look for or bring objects based on color, texture, shape, functionality or not, odors, temperatures, maybe tastes, etc. Allow for touch, comparison, exploration and sounds (words/music) to go along with the whole experience. Use words and use silences. Be present.
In the Intensive Care Unit (ICU) at the emergency hospital after the first days and week of her stroke, they would bring food trays to my mother and she wouldn't eat anything. One day the tray had a bright perfectly round orange on it. It was the brightest thing in the room. I knew she wouldn't eat it but when they took the tray, I kept the orange. I didn't want to eat it either. I wanted it for play therapy.
I put the orange on her lap on top of her blankets. I just set it there. I don't even think I said anything right away. I made sure she saw it though because she was really just glancing around and trying to see what the nurses were doing in her observation window. She did not like the nighttime nurses because she had sundowners and they tied her wrists to the bed sides, so she wouldn't rip her IV out. It was an awful awful battle that I found out after observing soft ties tied around her wrists and asked what they were.
Then I started moving the orange. I touched her body with it. I turned her hand over and placed it in her hand and I also said some words with it like “That is a very beautiful orange” and “It is so round and it has a bumpy texture”. She didn't really respond, but she saw it. I knew she saw it. It also had a strong odor which she couldn't smell, I would find out much later.
The next day they brought the tray, she again didn't eat anything, but on the tray was a bright red apple. You know the kind: they're not exactly straight off an organic tree or one in your backyard. They seem to be far beyond perfect and probably tasteless but I kept it. Now I had an apple and an orange. I put them both on her lap. The contrast was lovely. The similarities were also quite obvious so I talked about it. They're both fruit, one red and one orange. The apple is not as round as the orange. Just a bunch of stuff like that. Simple. One or two words. Eventually, I put the apple in one of her hands and the orange in her other hand. She held them. Her hands were just resting on the blanket. She’d look back-and-forth, get distracted by the nurses in the viewing window, and then look at the fruit again.
Every day I brought things for her to see and every day I had to take them home because the nurses told me things get stolen. But the apple and the orange did not get stolen so we used them a lot. Every day I did a Brain Gym exercise called Naval Radiation where you roll a ball in a systematic way on someone's body starting in the center of the body and rolling out to each limb. I had been doing this with a ball I would bring but at this time I used the orange.
I got a lot of mileage out of those fruits.
Summary: Look for or bring objects based on color, texture, shape, functionality or not, odors, temperatures, maybe tastes, etc. Allow for touch, comparison, exploration and sounds (words/music) to go along with the whole experience. Use words and use silences. Be present.